Returning to the fold

No, Mom, I'm not going back to church.

I've tried delving into the Law of Attraction stuff for years, off and on. It usually goes well for a while, then there's a dry spell, which I equate with St. John of the Cross's "Dark Night of the Soul," and then I lose interest. When I was following Neville Goddard's teaching more closely, I would get disappointed when I didn't manifest in the time frame I'd set, which would make it harder to create the feeling of already having what I want. I like how the Hicks teaching goes: I align myself and not worry about time frame. It makes it easier to not get disappointed and run out of patience.

I think the overall problem is that what I would really like is to not have have my income tied to productive work at all, and I have a hard time believing that's possible. I think that I'd like to read or go to school for a living, but once income is tied to it, it sounds less fun. Not that I've been able to find someone to pay me to do those things.

So I've been working for Massage Envy. They pay $16/hour, which is less than I've made since my first year out of nursing school, and thinking about that made me feel poor. I got pretty down about it, until a couple of weeks ago when I was joking with a client about winning the lottery.

She turns out to be a fan of The Secret, and reminded me that in the movie it's pointed out that some people who win lotteries win multiple lotteries. I wouldn't have thought anything about it except I had just read a news article about a woman who had won the Texas state lottery three times then moved to California. She visited Texas a few weeks ago and won again--her 4th jackpot bringing her overall winnings to $20 million.

Hmmmm, I thought. Perhaps I should look into this stuff again. So I downloaded Money and the Law of Attraction from Audible.com, and have been listening and aligning myself since.

She didn't show for her last appointment. I hope it's because she won the lottery.